You goddamn assholes making me start a Blogspot just for UFC picks...aw hellllll no. Aw helllllllllllllllll no. Man fuck it, what else am I going to do on a Friday night ? Heard I missed some good shit between Taco Palace Fights and XFC. Shit. Time to get down to some fucking business. Also, I still hate Facebook and everyone on there.
Onward To Golgotha
Let me start off by saying I've only seen like one episode of TUF, and that was the first one. And it was a motherfucker but goddamn do I hate the rest of the shit in between the fights. Tired ass format, PLEASE end this show. Unless the next season is Brittney Palmer vs Arianny and every week they have to do a food eating challenge in bikinis and whoever puts on the most weight gets to go on a date with me. I'd certainly watch that. The Ultimate Fatter 15: Brittney vs Arianny vs Me
Ok that's enough. Yeah so Mayhem has no chance in this fight. As much of a raging pile of cunt that Michael Bisping is, he's not a bad fighter. I mean he's not great or anything and he will never get a title shot but he's well rounded (except when it comes to basic footwork and circling out of dudes with right hands) and I think he's got the wussy style to beat Mayhem.
Everyone seems to forget that Mayhems last win was against a dying Sakuraba who should be making shitty California Rolls for sushi posers in my town, not fighting. And the rest of his wins weren't against top competition. Yeah Bisping ain't a world beater but SHUT UP. I'M TRYING TO FORM A FUCKING THOUGHT HERE. GOD. Ok I'm rambling way too hard. Mayhem will have a hard time getting Bisping down and he doesn't have the power to KO him so this will end up being 5 (why is this bullshit 5 fucking rounds ?) rounds of Bisping fighting like a cunt and jab/right crossing his way to a boring decision. Bisping by boring. Sorry all you Mayhem fans :(
So Diego Brandao is supposed to be knocking dudes out and he loves Mike Tyson and Wandy ? Fuck yeah. Dennis Burmedez is a wrestler ? WHY THE FUCK DO THESE GUYS HAVE THE SAME INITIALS. Fuck I hate wrestlers that aren't named Chael Sonnen. Diego TADOW by Brazilian Brutality Brought To You By Sepultura - Beneath To The Remains.
John Dodson looks like a fucking bitch. Stay in Taco Palace and fight at 125 you Greg Jackson goober. Tijuana Dillashaw also looks like a fucking snitch that would try to talk to your girlfriend at a party whilst you're in the corner sneezing cause the hosts of said party had cats and didn't inform you and now your allergies are going crazy. Fuck short people. Dillashaw by training with Team Alfalfa Male.
Apparently El Cucuy has sick power and reach and Yves Edwards chin is shot ? Man, I prooobably won't be watching this card anyways so I don't really give a shit either way. Somebody by highlight reel finish. That's all I'm asking for.
Louis "Clay Guida Is My Idol And My Green Hair Is Fucking Stupid But It Gives Me Character" Guido pisses me off so fucking hard. You really dyed your hair green bro ? You fucking dumb fuck. You don't play keyboards in a Mudvayne cover band from 1998. Get your life together and look like a real person. Fucking christ. I don't know the other guys name but he can't possibly be a bigger douche than this fuckhead. Other by not being a fucking asshat.
I'm not doing the rest of the card because I hate you. Can't wait for next week so I can go on a Joan Jones rant. Fuck. I'm out.
-Get Fat
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